Transitions

While most of the country is cooling down, these are our warmest days of the year in northern California.

And still, the rituals of autumn persist.

It’s time to slow down, to take stock and to prepare.

I’m imagining all the wild creatures fattening up and harboring for a dormant winter. I’m meticulously making lists, cooking like mad, and methodically getting ready for my surgery that is now only two months away.

Soaking up energetic light and meeting myself where I’m at — mornings like this are sacred.

One Year Later

Today I am launching this website and sharing the journey that is a part of me.

I feel blessed to be here and to have people willing to stay at my side, smile, and cry with me, to understand my pain, to pray for my health, to help me stay level-headed and to, and to reassure me everything will be ok.

It takes a strong, graceful friend to accept another’s vulnerability.

I am so grateful for the care provided by my doctors and the love of my friends.

And this,

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.

It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.

Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow."

— Melody Beattie

My Body

This not-so-little scar is going to need one more surgery soon. I'm seeking the best procedure and specialists to safely guide me thru {what I hope} is the final stage of healing. I am so thankful I'll be able to make the right choice for my body.

Inspiration

Birthday weekend: I drove to LA for urban inspiration. I practiced yoga and splashed in the ocean. I wined and dined on repeat. I said countless thanks for my health and celebrated all that is Me. Everything is as it should be. Here's to the twists, turns, miracles, and the mysteries of Life. L'chaim.

Surgery

Post opp. after my fourth surgery. I went into this procedure feeling nervous, anxious, and ready. We can hold mixed, often extreme emotions, in a single breath — it is the human condition. Scar tissue prevented the surgeon from doing what he set out to do and that's ok. We'll try again. I went home, got cozy, and listened to the rain and that's plenty fine for me.

I am Alive As Fuck

This is the post the inspired this website. :)

I am alive AF. 

I did it. I twisted, folded, mended, balanced, breathed, and cried my way thru my first yoga class since July. Above everything I have endured, missing yoga has been one of the more difficult challenges. I’ve felt both betrayed and disconnected from my body. But it is the same body that fought so hard and never gave up. Returning to yoga stirred tremendous emotions — sadness, anger, gratitude. A room of practicing yogis is potent, powerful, healing energy. 
This week’s full moon arrived in Scorpio season, the sign of death and rebirth. The full moon was in fertile Earth sign Taurus and brought emotions, and changes so we can create something new out of the endings that have taken place. 
I remember returning to consciousness in ICU, totally unaware, of my surgeries or my close encounter with the other side. I tried to sit up and I couldn't even lift the sand-bag-dead weight of my torso.

I have rehabilitated myself back from zero.

I am alive AF.

Progress

I made it 34 days at home and was re-admitted to UCSF Medical Center on Saturday at 4am. We're staying on the front end of my healing and early this morning I had my third surgery. I'm tired, a little dopey, somewhat sore, and overall I'm optimistic that this is the final push towards a complete recovery.

If you are so inclined, any support, or sharing this would be welcomed with Love. https://www.gofundme.com/leah-rosenthal

Cheers

At the dock yards — my first night out in many moons.
💃🏼